Journey of the End of a Lifetime

by Joanna Smith on Jul 19, 2016

This is a blog about the end of a life, an option possible because of the newly established California End of Life Option Act.

I Can’t Do What I Want To Do Anymore
I first met PS when she was in a nursing home after a hospital stay. I had been contacted by a physician who had an End of Life Options Practice where he assisted people at looking at all of their end of life options: Palliative Care, Hospice and Aid in Dying.

PS was 65, depleted after a chaotic stay in the hospital and a discharge to the nursing home for rehab “to help her get strong again”. Her speech was slowed by her cerebellar ataxia, but her intent was clear: “I can no longer do the things I want to do; I can no longer be spontaneous; I can’t walk with my walker and I’m not getting stronger from rehab. I want to pursue my option to end my life and take the medication so I can die with dignity.”

I had had to think long and hard before I had decided I could work with her. I teach and credential people who want to become advocates: could I offer her the open support and good boundaries this process required? This would be her own death, and my work was to help her have as easy a process as possible. No room here for doubts on my part or counter-transference. Could I support her one thousand percent in her quest? Because if I could not, I had no business being an advocate on her behalf. At this point, she needed people who were complete in their support of her wishes.

I had decided that I was one of those people–took a deep breath–and stepped forward to help her create the kind of death she wanted.

First Best Practice for Advocates Working With Aid-In-Dying clients: Know Thyself. Very well.